New Therapist, New Me

Not too long ago, I began contemplating whether I needed to continue going to therapy. After a harmful situation with a therapist where I lost trust in the process, I took a hiatus exploring peer support groups and other self-care activities to maintain my wellbeing. Homebound while postpartum in a global pandemic, I re-established myContinue reading “New Therapist, New Me”

Surviving COVID-19 and the Fear of Psychosis

Two years into the pandemic and I finally got sick with COVID-19. While being incapacitated in bed or on the couch was not fun, getting sick allowed me to face my worst fear. Out of all the things that could happen — respiratory problems, loss of taste and smell, or the chronic fatigue and persistingContinue reading “Surviving COVID-19 and the Fear of Psychosis”

Maintenance is Harder

I realized that I was in the maintenance phase of my recovery when the drama disappeared and life started slowing down. I would have off days like any regular human being, but I did not know how to cope with them. I was so used to dealing with distress that I felt like I couldContinue reading “Maintenance is Harder”

Healing Journey: Depression & the Fear of Fatigue

I have a complicated relationship with rest. For several years, I refused to let myself relax in bed and binge Netflix because this felt too akin to depression. During a major depressive episode in college, I binged 11 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy in one summer sitting in alone in my bed in darkness from morningContinue reading “Healing Journey: Depression & the Fear of Fatigue”

Spoon Theory & Bipolar: A Conversation with Rebecca W. Morris

My favorite thing about social media is the ability to find kindred spirits and connect with people you would have zero chance of actually meeting in real life. One such person is Rebecca W. Morris, a disabled and chronically ill artist who lives in Spain. She reached out to me about being featured in herContinue reading “Spoon Theory & Bipolar: A Conversation with Rebecca W. Morris”

PSA: Perinatal Bipolar Support Group

I am incredibly excited to announce the debut of a new support group which I will co-facilitating called Bipolar Support for Perinatal Moms & Birthing People hosted by Postpartum Support International (PSI). Since not all people with wombs identify as women or mothers, this group welcomes all birthing people (parents who have carried and birthedContinue reading “PSA: Perinatal Bipolar Support Group”

Thinking with Dyane Harwood: Birth of a New Brain

Although I lived with a bipolar diagnosis years before my own crisis with mania and depression during pregnancy, I was intrigued by both the familiarity and foreignness of postpartum bipolar.* As I began to do more research, I stumbled across Dyane Harwood’s memoir Birth of a New Brain: Healing from Postpartum Bipolar Disorder (2017). TheContinue reading “Thinking with Dyane Harwood: Birth of a New Brain”

Healing Journey: Food & Fitness

This week was the first time since 2019 that I had been inside a gym or a group fitness space. Believe it or not, in my past life (from 2017-2019) I was actually a fitness instructor. I stopped teaching fitness classes when I got pregnant and quickly descended into my most frightening and prolonged manicContinue reading “Healing Journey: Food & Fitness”

Emerging Out of the Wormhole

If you follow this blog, you may have notice that I’ve fallen off my weekly posting rhythm. The last couple of weeks have been quite hellish in my head and in my household. My toddler got her first cold and came down with the terrible twos.(The tantrums and antics have been particularly pronounced!) My husband,Continue reading “Emerging Out of the Wormhole”

Madness & The Intuitive Mind

During this new phase of mastery in managing my mental illness, I have been struggling to make sense of extra-sensory, intuitive experiences I’ve encountered in my stability. In manic and depressive states, I am very sensitive to energy emitted from the “unseen.” I am tuned into the vibrations of the Earth through the weather andContinue reading “Madness & The Intuitive Mind”